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Parallel parenting: An idea if you and your ex are at odds

On Behalf of | Sep 18, 2022 | Divorce

Co-parenting can be a real challenge if you and your ex are not on friendly terms. The two of you will have to communicate about your child despite any tensions. If you don’t see eye to eye about most things, that antagonism may carry over to discussions about your youngster’s medical care or education.

Maybe it’s just too painful to have much contact with the person you were married to. You’re human. Sometimes you simply can’t ignore those feelings or stop them from getting in the way.

In light of that, is there any workable arrangement that permits both of you to raise your child after your divorce? Actually, there is. It’s called parallel parenting. It can be a sensible solution to a thorny issue.

Putting parallel parenting into practice

Parallel parenting operates on a much different basis than co-parenting, which is a child-rearing collaboration between you and your former spouse. In parallel parenting, particular duties or areas are the responsibility of one parent or the other. Specifics can be clarified in the parenting plan you have.

So maybe you are the parent who will attend your youngster’s sports events. The other parent can take your child to their doctor’s appointments. You might want to be in charge of their religious training while your ex handles school matters.

This allows for little or no contact between the two of you. You both participate in your child’s life but do it separately. Your child also has the advantage of both of you being present for them.

Crafting a parenting plan based upon this concept

Your parenting plan should be as detailed as possible, That minimizes the likelihood of misunderstandings cropping up, which causes more friction. Consider including language about fundamentals like visiting times, who takes care of transportation, and alternatives if one of you has to change that day’s parenting schedule.

Parallel parenting can be a way out of an uncomfortable situation

If you endured a high-conflict divorce, the last thing you want is more conflict. Parallel parenting can be a way to avoid that.  Request some guidance in writing your parenting plan, so you don’t get hung up on any fine points.